News Flash: UFOs to Blame for Theft at Caterpillar Site?

La Satira News Service

Investigators from local police departments, the FBI, and the FAA are looking into a strange episode of theft at a storage facility for Caterpillar construction equipment.

“We don’t really know what happened,” said Vince Bachova, regional vice president for Kukla Dry Storage Solutions of Southwestern Nevada, the company that owns and manages the site.  “Vandals broke into the facility overnight and made off with most of the equipment we had stored here. ”

The facility, a long-term, outdoor storage facility for heavy construction equipment that has been temporarily mothballed, was created three years ago as a response to sagging demand for such equipment in the current economic downturn.  After only six months, the facility had reached its storage capacity, with no equipment being removed–until now.

The question of how the theft was done is a perplexing one.  The impressive security fences around the facility were intact, and none of the perimeter alarms were activated.  The facility itself lies in a valley surrounded on three sides by mountains.  The only road to the facility passes the residence of the site’s caretaker, who is not a suspect in the case.

The only clue in the case are large piles of steel foil left behind in place of each piece of equipment.  The foil appears to be some sort of protective covering for the equipment:  the sole piece of equipment not taken in the heist–an old, rusty bulldozer–was found wrapped in the stuff.

“It doesn’t seem likely that someone would take down the fence, steal the equipment, and replace the fence again once they’d gotten away,” said Bachova, the regional vice president.  “I guess they could have airlifted it out, but it would take a pretty big helicopter.  And even around here, people would notice a helicopter.  And even so, that doesn’t explain these piles of foil.”

While no suspicious helicopter activity has been reported, the theft did coincide with an uptick in the number of reported UFO sightings in the area.

“It didn’t look like a UFO, though,” said Morton Piattino, a resident who lives within a couple miles of the facility and who claims to have seen one of the mysterious objects.  “Or at least it didn’t look like the ones you generally see.  It landed on that outcropping of rock over there, so I got a pretty good look at it.  It looked more like… you’re not going to believe this, but it looked more like a giant mechanical butterfly.”

“That’s not true,” said Daryl Soukoup, another neighbor.  “The body shape was stouter, the antennae were feathery, and its wings in the resting posture were in a downward position.  It was more like a giant mechanical moth.”

Official sources discount the UFO tie-in and are continuing their search for more terrestrial indications.

Copyright 2012

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One Response to “News Flash: UFOs to Blame for Theft at Caterpillar Site?”

  1. Wil \maddeaux Says:

    \isn’t this backwards\? Don’t the cats usually chase the moths?

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