News Flash: Mob Seeks Vengeance for Weather Prank

Dafw, TX– A seemingly innocent prank took a dangerous turn and left the local Weather Bureau office besieged by an angry mob.

An employee at the service, tired of posting an endless series of forecasts predicting triple-digit heat, posted instead the forecast for Seattle, Washington, which called for high temperatures in the 70s and lows in the 50s.

“People started calling us, practically in tears of joy, thanking us for the relief from the heat,” said office director Kelvin Fahrenheit in a telephone interview, “though of course we really can’t take credit for any relief that does come.  But then we had to tell them it was a hoax and apologize.”

This information, Mr. Fahrenheit said, was generally met with stony silence—at best.

Then crowds started gathering around the block containing the Weather Bureau offices, chanting and demanding the head of the prankster.

“It’s outrageous of them to pull a stunt like this,” said Summer Hamilton, one of the protesters.  “We’ve been waiting for weeks for it to get cool enough to let us make some outdoor plans.  And just when it looked like it was about to happen, we find out it’s all a joke?  No wonder people are hot under the collar!”

“This could get very ugly,” said on-looker Stacy Schlitterbahn, whose office is nearby.  “At first the protest was mostly peaceful, but then they sent out a public relations person to try to calm the crowd down and negotiate.  That was fine, until their PR person said something about hoping that cooler heads would prevail.  Things went downhill rapidly after that.”

While the mobs have remained outside, the building itself has been pelted with empty water bottles, tubes of sunscreen, and the occasional sno-cone.  A riot squad is said to be en route, though they have been delayed by a highway that buckled due to the heat.

Although the correct forecast is now showing on the company website, the mobs are continuing their vigil.

Inside the office, Mr. Fahrenheit did not sound optimistic.  “While we’re still hoping for a peaceful resolution, we think there is a 70% chance of them storming the building.  Office employees are advised to prepare for the worst by securing furniture and other objects that could present a hazard, and by avoiding windows and taking shelter in an interior room.  All preparations should be complete before the storm arrives in the area.  This severe storm warning will last through the evening hours.”

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